Low-Tech Comfort

I have to admit that I rather like this cold, clear weather. At least the sun is shining.

Yesterday morning, Kris and I sat in the parlor — she with her book, I with my laptop — and basked in the sunlight, which filtered through the tall windows. All four cats joined us.

Nemo sat on a bench, squinting and smiling into the sun. Meatball lounged on the floor. Simon sniffed the furniture to be sure that nothing had changed. Toto stood around and glowered at her brothers.

It was a warm feeling, both in terms of temperature and emotion. My toes were cold (because our floor is never warm), but I was wearing slippers, so that mitigated some of the discomfort. I wrote. Kris read. The cats were cats.

At one point, Simon decided he had had enough of sniffing furniture, so he turned his attention to his little brother. He walked to the bench, stood on his haunches, and grappled with Nemo. Nemo squeaked and tried to fight back, but ran in retreat after Simon hopped up and applied the full weight of his sixteen pounds. (Though Simon only weighs sixteen pounds — a fact we verified yesterday afternoon — he seems to way twenty. Or more. He’s a fat boy. I’ve begun to call him “Jumbo”, which he doesn’t appreciate.)

Time passed.

Simon wandered off to watch birds out the kitchen window. Meatball took his place on the bench. Nemo hopped on the love seat, looking for a place that he might escape Simon’s notice. Toto glowered. I wrote. Kris read.

Simon returned from his bird-watching duties and looked at the bench. He seemed disappointed to find Meatball in Nemo’s place, but then he decided, “What the hell.” He walked to the bench, stood on his haunches, and grappled with Meatball. Meatball has not yet learned his place. He’s deferent to the other cats. So when Simon whapped him, Meatball didn’t know what to do. He whapped back, but without much conviction. Poor Meatball.


The temperature dropped to -8 degrees centigrade at home last night. According to my weather station, it’s -8.8 degrees centigrade here at the shop even as I type. This wouldn’t be so bad if it were warm in my office. But it’s not.

My office is warmed by a tiny space heater. If it’s left to run around the clock, it can generally handle the heating chores on normal January days. But when it’s this cold, and when the thing has been turned down for the weekend, my office turns into an icebox. It was barely 10 degrees centigrade in here when I got to work this morning. It’s only 13.0 degrees centigrade now. My fingers are cold. They’re not numb, but they’re cold. Periodically, I set the heater on my lap and hug it to my chest. Ouch. It hurts so good…

Pastoral Winter

Ah, winter. It’s cold in Oregon. Very cold.

The older I get, the better able I am to predict the regular, natural flow of the weather patterns. (This is frustrated somewhat by the gradual shift caused by global climate change, but the general trends hold true.) The last few years have each been unusual in some way or other. Last year was very wet, for example. This year, however, had been a by-the-book Portland winter, and that trend is continuing.

We had a light dusting of snow late in the week, and then the cold weather set in. I expect this in mid-January. I expect the coldest snap to reach us later in the month or at the beginning of February. That’s also the most likely time for good snowfall.

Then, in mid-February, the sun will begin to exert its presence, and the clear days won’t just be clear — they’ll be warm, too. I remember those days fondly from my years at college: everyone traipsing around in shorts because the high temperatures approached sixty degrees, people lounging around the plaza. Good times.

Now the clear, bright days of winter — whether cold or warm — mean yardwork, especially on the weekends. There are fruit trees to prune, grapes to prune, berries to prune, roses to prune, hedges to prune. I could spend my whole life pruning.

It’s nice, though, to be working in the yard with the birds, and the cats (who like the birds), and my wife (who likes the cats and the birds). It’s a pleasant, relaxing thing, and a fine change of pace from my constant connection to the computer.

Yesterday morning, I spent some time outside with the cats. Simon, Nemo, and Meatball helped me prune the grapes, the apple trees, and the berries. They thought it was great fun. I thought it was cold. My fingers and toes were numb within minutes — how must their paws have felt? I’m at something of a loss when it comes to pruning. I have a book that is intended to guide me, but actually raises more questions than it answers. I should check to see if the extension service has better information.

Simon had some excitement while he was out. The new renter across the street has the annoying habit of letting her dogs loose without supervision — she opens the door and lets them roam free. They’re nice dogs, and I like them, but I don’t like the way they come tromping through our yard. Yesterday the larger of the two spied simon and chased him up the cedar tree. sigh He was stuck about twenty feet up, cold and frightened. We left him there for about an hour before I decided to coax him down. He scooted down butt-first, squeaking his whiney little cry the entire time, until he was within reach if I stood on tip-toes. Then he wouldn’t come any further. He kept looking down at me, squeaking. I managed to grab his fat ass and pull him down, and he ran inside where it was safe and warm.

Pastoral lifestyle, indeed!

Breaking Internet Addiction

This probably won’t come as a shock to those who are close to me — or even those who barely know me — but the internet has become something of a time sink for me. It’s true that I now view blogging as my vocation, and this, by its very nature, requires me to stay well-connected; but it’s also true that I fritter away hours every day with what are essentially prolonged repetitive distractions.

  • I check e-mail. Constantly.
  • I monitor my site statistics. Constantly.
  • I keep tabs on my RSS feeds.
  • I check my favorite sites for updates.
  • I google or wikipedia anything that occurs to me to google or wikipedia.
  • I play mindless games.

There’s nothing wrong with doing these things once-in-a-while, but they’re constant distractions for me. They’re not productive. I have now gone eight minutes without checking e-mail or site stats. It’s astounding that I know this. It’s sad that I know this. And yet in a couple more minutes, the urge will be so strong that I’ll stop what I’m doing here to check again. And then I’ll check again in another few minutes.

The writers guild met last night. (Have I mentioned how much I’ve come to value these meetings?) I go to the pub early so that I can be frugal and purchase food at happy hour prices. This gives me an hour on my own. (Sometimes Paul shows up early, too, and we can chat.)

Last night I took my laptop. The pub has no internet connection. For one full blissful hour, I was working on my computer as I normally do but without a connection to the net. You would not believe how productive I was. I responded to sixteen pieces of e-mail and queued them for later sending. (In fact, I started the evening with 76 pieces of e-mail in my inbox; when I finished, I’d whittled that to 24 pieces.) I figured out how to use iCal’s to-do list and began to add things to it. (AmyJo, you’ll be happy to hear that I added: “Fix AmyJo’s blog” to the list!) I created a schedule for upcoming entries at Get Rich Slowly. I even wrote outlines of a few of these entries.

I was able to get more done in an hour than I usually do in a day. It was awesome.

“I need to find a place like that in Oak Grove,” I told Kris when I returned home. “A place where I can linger, but which does not have an internet connection.”

“What about the library?” she asked.

“That’s good, but it has its own distractions. The place I need can’t have other stuff to tempt me away from the task at hand.”

The quest is on. I need to find a spot I can sit and work. I wonder if the Chinese restaurant I like so much would mind if I took up a booth for a few hours on mid-Friday or mid-Saturday afternoons?

(Hooray for small victories! I managed to write this entire entry without checking stats or e-mail. That’s eighteen minutes of discipline. Discipline that ends right now…)

Totally Tomatoes

Kris is crazy. She’s crazy for tomatoes. Here we are, in the coldest darkest corner of the year, and she’s conspiring with her cronies to order tomatoes. She’s itching to get them planted. She feels like she’s running late.

With Craig and Amy Jo, she buys specialty seeds from an outfit called Totally Tomatoes. This year the three of them ordered:

  • Black From Tula
  • Aunt Ruby’s German Green
  • Bloody Butcher
  • San Marzano
  • Dr. Wyches Yellow
  • Box Car Willie
  • Red Star
  • Rutgers VFASt

Kris just spent $25 on tomato seeds (which will work out to less than $1.50/plant between the three). She also spent $60 for a set of five super-deluxe tomato ladders. “If they work, I’ll get five more,” she told me. “I’m hoping that these will prevent some of the tomato crises we had last year.” (I’m hoping they will, too. Tomato crises are, well, crises. And of major proportions.)

Soon our parlor will be a mass of growlights, potting soil, and plants. Nosey law-enforcement could be forgiven for suspecting she was growing pot. She’s not. It’s just tomatoes.

She’s totally tomatoes.

But so are her friends. Witness Amy Jo:

I finally opened one of the jars of roasted Black Tula tomato sauce last week…oh, my, yum. Paul isn’t much of fan of typical tomato sauces but this one is meaty and smoky, perfect for hearty pasta dishes…

And Craig:

Mmmmmm, tomatoes.

You can count me out of the Raad Red, my tomato roster is full, full, full. I’ll try any pepper though, I actually had some success with them last year.

Mmmmmm, tomatoes.

Albert and I have been spending 1/2 hour each evening in the attic setting up the grow lights and plant shelves. The urge to grow stuff is hitting me early this year.

Mmmmmm, tomatoes.

These e-mails were intercepted and used without permission, which may get me into trouble with the tomato fanatics. I’ll take my chances. Lisa’s aware of the madness, too. When I smiled knowingly at these poor souls via e-mail, she replied:

There’s a long list of tomato varieties on our kitchen counter even
as I type.

She snapped this photo of Craig and Albert planting early seeds:

Good man, Craig — it looks like you’re using Territorial.

This morning I was razzing Kris again about her tomato fixation. She became indignant. “You don’t know,” she said. “People are jealous of our tomatoes.”

I laughed. “That’s going in the entry, too,” I told her.

“Don’t you dare,” she said. “Remember: I have veto privileges. If you post that you may lose your rights to write about me.” I laughed again, but she was serious. (I’m taking a risk by posting this, obviously — I believe it’s for the greater good.)

We talked some more about tomatoes and her exclusive tomato club. “How come Rhonda’s not in it?” I asked. She buys starts. “And Jenn?” Starts again. Plus kids. “Pam?” More starts. And a kid (with another coming). And too far away.

Kris turned to me. “Tomatoes are not toys,” she said, in a tone that indicated children precluded sensible parents from growing tomatoes from seed. (Except for Craig, apparently. But then Craig is Craig, and he could grow tomatoes from seed even if he had a dozen children.)

Maybe she should start a tomato blog.

Bonus: Maybe Kris needs this?

605 BZT

My drive to work Monday morning was typical: a slow, winding jaunt through Oak Grove, Gladstone, Oregon City, and then to Canby. Traffic moved smoothly. There was nothing out of the ordinary.

All that changed, however, once I turned onto Ivy for the final stretch to the office. When I entered the school zone, the car in front of me slowed to 20mph. This is annoying, but it’s not uncommon. For some reason, a few people don’t realize that a sign which reads SPEED 20mph 7-5 School Days doesn’t apply to traffic at 6:50am. What was annoying is when the driver in front of me didn’t bother to increase speed after the school zone ended.

The driver did accelerate once we hit the 40mph zone, but rather than increase speed once we passed the End 40mph sign, continued to putter along at 40mph for mile after mile, out past Lone Elder, out past Four Mile Nursery, all the way to Gribble Road. I hadn’t been late to work before, but I was pushing it now. (Being late to work once in a pay period costs me $50.)


My drive to work yesterday morning was typical: a slow, winding jaunt through Oak Grove, Gladstone, Oregon City, and then to Canby. Traffic moved smoothly. There was nothing out of the ordinary.

All that changed, however, once I turned onto Ivy for the final stretch to the office. When I entered the school zone, the car in front of me slowed to 20mph.

“What the—?” I said out loud. I looked. It was the same car as Monday: an older white sports car with the license plate 605 BZT. I groaned and resigned myself to the exquisite torture ahead of me. I checked my clock. It was 6:53, which left me seven minutes to get to work without losing my on-time bonus. Normally this would be a four or five minute drive. Now? It was hard to say.

Again the driver maintained 20mph even after he school zone. Again the driver stayed at 40mph all the way to Gribble Road. Again I barely made it to work on time.


My drive to work today was a little unusual, though it was never quite fun: my slow, winding jaunt to Canby was enlivened by the first mush snowflakes of an expected one-inch accumulation. My wipers didn’t actually handle them well for some reason. I listened to my audiobook on my iPod, and enjoyed the white stuff.

All that changed, however, once I turned onto Ivy for the final stretch to the office. When I entered the school zone, the car in front of me slowed to 20mph. “It can’t be!” I said to myself. But it was. There in front of me was my friend, 605 BZT.


I actually have a hypothesis about drivers like this. They’re not uncommon around Canby. I suspect that they’re recent Mexican transplants who are not familiar with English or the traffic laws. New arrivals are tentative drivers who only see the numbers and don’t understand the text of the sign. I have no way to test this hypothesis, of course. (Also, I know it sounds vaguely racist. Trust me — it’s not.)

Can I Get an iPhone?

You cannot possibly understand how much I’m dying inside, how desperately anxious I am for Steve Jobs’ keynote address at MacWorld tomorrow. I’ve always enjoyed the sense of anticipation for these, but this time it’s almost more than I can bear. Why? I don’t really know.

Part of it is that I can afford to — and expect to — purchase whatever gadgets he happens to announce. But mostly I think it’s because I’ve just become aware how handy it would be to have a truly Mac-oriented phone/information manager. And wouldn’t you know it? That’s what he’s expected to unveil. I have my fingers crossed that:

  1. He will indeed announce such a device;
  2. The device will actually do much, much more (approaching a mini-computer); and
  3. The device won’t be exorbitantly expensive (relatively speaking).

Of course, I won’t actually be able to pay attention to Jobs’ speech. I have an appointment with a customer, and then have to make the company Costco trip. This just makes things all the more painful!

Artist’s concept (there’s almost no chance this image is genuine):

Movie Preview: The Golden Compass

There’s a film coming next winter — it’s set to open on December 7th — that’s sure to excite many of my friends as much (or more than) the next Harry Potter movie. Philip Pullman‘s His Dark Materials trilogy is finally being turned into a major studio production, and the stills from first film have been released. Here are ten of them.

These are from The Golden Compass (which is known as Northern Lights in the U.K.). The second part is The Subtle Knife and the third is The Amber Spyglass.

[Lyra walking across chairs]
This must be near the beginning of the film: Lyra roaming Oxford.

[Daniel Craig is Lord Asriel]
Daniel Craig, the latest James Bond, is Lord Asriel.

[Nicole Kidman is Mrs. Coulter]
Nicole Kidman should make an excellent Mrs. Coulter.

[Coulter meets Lyra]
Coulter meets Lyra. Run, Lyra, run!

[more Coulter]

[Scoresby meets Lyra]
Scoresby to the rescue.

[in the snow...]

[Coulter is a force of nature]

[Lyra with the compass]
Lyra with the titular golden compass.

No Iorek yet (I can’t wait) and no daemons. Digital effects take longer to produce, of course, so we probably won’t see examples of those until the summer at least. Still, I’m heartened by these stills. Kris and I are excited by what we see.

Back to the Future

Kris has been pestering me for two-and-a-half years to hook up the VCR. When we moved from Canby to Oak Grove, we bought a new television. For some reason, the VCR didn’t get reconnected. (That reason is probably related to Netflix.)

Although we watch a lot of films on DVD, we still have many, many videotapes. It doesn’t make any sense to replace most of these, and yet without the VCR hooked up, they’re worthless. I’ve been buying films on DVD when we want to watch them. This is dumb.

Finally, Kris had enough. Top on my list of New Years chores was “hook up the VCR”. I was dreading it. I’m not an A/V guy. (That’s Jeff.) I figured it would take me half an hour and much cursing to get things to work.

Imagine my surprise when the process actually took all of thirty seconds. I’d already done most of the work at some previous time. (Why hadn’t I finished it?) All I needed to do was plug things in and test a tape. It worked like a charm.

Kris spent her New Years Day watching videos: The Joy Luck Club, Elizabeth, Two Girls and a Sailor. (The latter is an old June Allyson flick featuring a song that Kris likes to bellow from time-to-time: “The Young Man With a Horn”.) I’m sure it’s just a matter of time before she digs out Anne of Green Gables. I’m glad to have done this, though — it makes her happy.

And meanwhile I can go downstairs to play Wii bowling. I’m regularly scoring 200+ now and have a rank of “pro”. (My high score is 257.) I can get about seven strikes per game, but I can’t string together any more than that. I’m actually very curious to bowl for real this Saturday. My normal score is ~155. Will my weeks of Wii bowling help my score or hinder it? Stay tuned. (And for some real fun, watch this video of a perfect game in Wii bowling.)

Bonus: Colbert vs. Pelosi in Wii boxing.

Okay. One more:

Meatball’s Big Adventure

It hasn’t taken Max long to become my favorite cat at home. He’s lovable: he’s soft, he’s cuddly, he’s playful, he’s quick to purr. He’s quick, intelligent, ornery, and non-aggressive. Simon and Nemo are warming to him, though they’re both worried he wants to play a little too much. Even Toto sometimes forgets to growl or hiss at him.

The only real trouble is that Max is lost outside. When he lived at Custom Box he was outside most of the time, but he spent that time with his brother (and their chicken friend). I’ve begun to let him outside here for supervised exploring, but he seems confused. “This isn’t the place I’m used to,” he seems to say, and he bolts to the bushes.

On Saturday morning, Max had an adventure.

“You should take Meatball outside,” Kris told me. I was laying in bed. “His brothers are outside, and he’s complaining about the injustice.”

I pulled on my pajamas and called Max to the door. He bolted outside, exhilarated by the cold air on his fur. He ran up to Simon and bumped noses. Then, as Simon sniffed the discarded Christmas tree, Max ventured into the trees and bushes at the south edge of the property. I stood back, watching him. He sniffed everything. Eventually he made his way to the street and began to cross it.

“No no, Meatball. Guess again,” I said. I picked him up and carried him back to the lawn. He returned to the shrubs.

He was intrigued by the neighbors’ yard, but annoyed at the chain-link fence that separates the spaces. No matter. He used his cat-like reflexes to leap onto the fence and then drop to the other side.

“You meatball,” I said. He wandered from tree to rock to bush to camper, sniffing everything. Then I heard the dogs barking.

The neighbor dogs are friendly enough, but they’re dogs. If they see a strange cat, their dog-minds turn to sport. They mean no harm. They’re just dogs. “Max,” I called softly. “Max. Come here. Come here, Meatball.” He ignored me, as cats are wont to do.

I went to get Kris. “I need your help,” I said. “Meatball’s in the neighbors’ yard.” She grabbed their Christmas basket and we walked next door. The dogs — Jasmine and Larry and Charlie — came to greet us. We looked around, but we couldn’t see any sign of Max.

We spent a few minutes visiting with Tammy. We gave her the gift basket. She gave us some rum cake. Then we mentioned that we had a new cat, a new cat that was currently someplace in her yard. She laughed and called the dogs inside. We went out to find our boy.

I checked under the camper. Kris checked in the arborvitae hedge. “Max,” I called, “Maxie!” Kris called for him, too: “Meatball. Come here, Meatball!” He was nowhere to be found.

“I wonder where he could be,” I said. “Maybe he went back over.”

Just then Kris spotted him. “There he is,” she said, pointing into the neighbors’ magnolia. “What a meatball.” He was as high as he could get — 20-25 feet off the ground — out on a limb.

“I’m too old for this,” I said, when I realized what I had to do. Magnolias aren’t great climbing trees, not even grand old magnolias like this one. But I did my best. I climbed about halfway to Max, and then tried to coax him to me. He understood my intention, but, quite frankly, didn’t find “down” as easy as he had found “up”. It probably took him ten minutes to scrabble down five feet to where I could reach him.

I steeled my mind (as one must do in these situations). “Pain doesn’t matter,” I told myself. “Whatever he does, no matter how much he scratches, it’s most important to get ahold of him.” I grabbed him and pulled. He squirmed and clawed, but I managed to pull him to my chest and soothe him. Then I realized there was no way for me to descend, especially while holding a cat. “Here,” I said, and I dropped Max onto a large branch below me. From there, Kris was able to grab him.

I ran back to our yard while Kris carried Meatball to the fence. She dropped him into the underbrush, and he ran for the mudroom door. “At least he knows where home is,” I said.

Max spent the rest of the day inside, cuddling with Mom and Dad.