1000 Miles Across Britain

After renting a Paris flat for one week, Kim and I began the second leg of our European adventure. We boarded the Eurostar train at Gare du Nord and zipped across the French countryside, under the English Channel, and into the heart of London. There, we rented a car.

Day One: London to Bath

We had a car, one week of free time, and no real plans — except to be in Bath by nightfall. Using LateRooms.com, I’d booked a room at the Lansdown Grove Hotel. First, though, we had to get out of London.

While I reacquainted myself with driving a manual transition on the left side of the road, Kim played the role of navigator. As always, we made a great team. We gradually made our way from the heart of London to the surrounding highways. After an hour on the M4, we took to the country roads. And as dusk fell, we drove into Bath.

It took us a little bit of time to find the Lansdown Grove Hotel. (During our search, we managed to set off the car alarm at a gas station — with Kim inside the car.) But once we found it, we had a relaxing evening.

The Lansdown Grove Hotel is a charming place, at least by my standards. It may be one of the oldest hotels in Bath, and it certainly has one of the oldest clientele. Kim and I — both over 40 — seemed to be the youngest guests by two or three decades, but that just added to the appeal of the place.

We were both excited to see that our room included a bathtub. In fact, the bathtub was huge and the water was hot (so hot that the hotel had posted warning signs). While Kim settled in for a much-needed soak, I went downstairs to ask for a wine opener. That simple request turned into a half-hour search for a corkscrew, one that ultimately proved futile. “All of our wine comes with twist-off caps,” the barman told me. “Only our most expensive bottle has a cork, and nobody ever orders that.” I laughed and bought a bottle of prosecco instead.

Day Two: Bath to Coventry

The next morning was bitter cold. It was also the start of a four-day holiday weekend in the U.K. Many businesses were closed for Good Friday, but fortunately we found a bookstore where we could purchase a road atlas.

Note: The bookstore we found was fantastic. While we browsed the stacks at Topping and Company, the staff served us French-press coffee and offered suggestions for touring England by car. Kim and I were both impressed by the variety of titles available. If I return to Bath, I intend to devote an hour or two to this store.

After picking up the atlas, we spent a couple of hours wandering the cold streets of Bath, including a quick stop at the Roman baths themselves. We also discovered we both like Cornish pasties. Eventually, we decided we’d better hit the road.

At the ancient Roman bath

We had a choice: Make tracks to the north of England or take our time on the country roads. Since we had no particular place to go, and since I wanted to see the stone circle at Avebury (something we rushed through the last time I was in England), we opted for the country roads. This worked well for a while.

Driving in England is much the same as driving in the United States. There are three main types of roads: freeways (and highways), city streets, and country roads. The highways and city streets are almost identical to those in the U.S. But it’s on the country roads that things often differ.

For one, country roads in the U.S. are generally wide open, surrounded by nothing, and it’s possible to zip along at a fair clip. That’s not how it works in the U.K. The country roads in the U.K. used to be bridle paths and carriageways. They wind and twist and turn, and they’re surrounded by hedgerows, which often obscure vision of the countryside and oncoming traffic. It’s fun to drive on English country roads, but it also takes a l-o-n-g time to get anywhere.

We discovered this after Avebury. We made good progress for a couple of hours, but then we hit a streak of bad luck. First, we got caught in a queue (what we would call a “traffic jam” in the U.S.). After escaping the queue, we found ourselves in a seemingly never-ending series of small towns. When we finally reached Coventry, we decided it was best to call it a day, far short of where we expected to be. We started searching for a hotel. We had no luck. Instead, we found ourselves in the middle of the country again.

We stopped at a pub to ask directions to the nearest hotel. A kind young woman wrote out instructions to the nearest place to stay, but following them put us on a dead-end road in a housing development. As we drove out, we spied a man out for a walk with his dog. He seemed to find his chat with Kim amusing and he directed us to a nice place nearby. But his directions also proved tough to follow, and we ended up in the next town. Eventually, we gave up. We spotted a Holiday Inn Express and stopped for the night.

After three hours of bad luck, we ought to have been in bad moods. Instead, we ordered fish and chips and a couple of pints of beer. Our moods soared so that we even ordered another plate of fish and chips. It had been a long day, but it ended well.

Day Three: Coventry to Carlops

After our bad luck the previous day, we decided not to leave anything to chance. As fun as it might be to see the English countryside, we opted instead to hop on the M6 motorway, the major freeway along the west side of the country. The views were mundane, but we made great progress for several hours.

We made such good progress, in fact, that we decided to take a scenic bypass, exiting the motorway to cut through the heart of the Lake District. Our friend Chris grew up there (and used to be a boxing champion of the area many years ago), and he’d given us his mother’s phone number in case we had time to drop in.

For two hours, we wended our way on country roads, looking at the hills and the lakes. We stopped to take photos and to admire the vistas. “I wish we had more time,” Kim said. “It would be nice to spend a few days here.” I agreed, but as it was, we didn’t even have a time to phone Chris’ mom.

Instead, we got back on the motorway, hoping to reach Carlisle by evening — or maybe even Glasgow. And here our luck improved.

We were nearing the Scottish border when we saw a road sign: GLASGOW 95, EDINBURGH 97. We couldn’t believe our good fortune. We could make it to Edinburgh by nightfall!

We exited the motorway and took to the country roads, heading north into the Scottish hillsides. We passed through small towns and little clusters of houses. As we approached Edinburgh, it occurred to me that it might be fun to stay in a bed and breakfast for a night. We began knocking on doors as we passed them, but nobody was taking boarders on the night before Easter.

In front of the fireplace at the Allan Ramsey Hotel

Finally, in Carlops, we found the Allan Ramsay Hotel, which was built in 1792 — and feels like it. (In a good way.) The owner rented us a room (we were the only lodgers for the night). After getting settled, we went downstairs to the pub, an atmospheric place with low ceilings, dim lighting, and warm fireplaces. It felt like the sort of place a traveler might have stayed in 1792. We enjoyed it too.

Day Four: Edinburgh

On Easter morning, we completed our journey north. We drove the last ten miles to Edinburgh, arriving in time to tour Edinburgh Castle before checking in at The George Hotel.

In the evening, we ate dinner at French restaurant. We had plenty of wine, which was very French, but after our week in Paris, we steered clear of the cheese. We were just cheesed out.

Day Five: Edinburgh

On Easter Monday — a bank holiday in the UK — we met an acquaintance for lunch. Amy Gross, who writes a fantastic wine blog had connected us with her friend, Frank Cusack. Frank was a valuable resource as we planned our trip, providing tons of tips and advice. He and his family met us for lunch at The Dome in downtown Edinburgh. We enjoyed good food and good company for two hours.

Then, in a very kind gesture, Frank had us hop into the family minivan. He drove us around the downtown area, showing us the sights and making recommendations. After our personalized tour, he dropped us at The Royal Mile. We strolled the street, looking at the shops. We stopped for a whisky tasting. I bought a scarf. Kim looked at jewelry.

Tasting whisky is a diverting pastime…

Eventually we found ourselves at the bar of the Hotel Missoni, where we ordered fancy drinks and chatted up the bartender while he trained a new employee. When we were ready for dinner, we stepped next door to Ondine, a popular new place in Edinburgh. We shared a giant seafood platter, with oysters, crab, lobster, clams, mussels, and more.

Note: There is a huge Italian presence in Edinburgh. There are Italian restaurants everywhere, the way there are Mexican restaurants all over the west coast of United States. And there are many Italian people working throughout the city.

Day Six: Edinburgh

In addition to connecting us with Frank, Amy Gross had recommended we try One Spa in downtown Edinburgh. I was a little skeptical. I’d never been to a spa, and it seemed a little spendy. But I wanted to treat Kim to a bit of relaxation, so we booked a morning together. It turned out to be a brilliant move.

We spent three hours in the “thermal suites” — heat rooms and saunas of all sorts — and the hydrotherapy pools. Very relaxing. And to cap it off, I enjoyed a 25-minute head massage while Kim had an hour-long back massage. The whole experience reset our moods. It was wonderful.

In the evening, Frank picked us up at the hotel to drive us to dinner. First, he gave us a driving tour of the city, pointing out landmarks and telling stories. Next, he took us to the Sheep Heid Inn, the oldest pub in Scotland (established in 1360!). Finally, he drove us to Angels with Bagpipes, one of Edinburgh’s most popular restaurants. Frank introduced us to the chef and to the owner, and then we sat down in a private room for a lovely meal.

Note: Kim and I are grateful to Frank for his hospitality. He made our stay in the city much more enjoyable than it might have been otherwise.

Day Seven: Edinburgh to London

I woke on Wednesday with an upset stomach. I couldn’t even finish my coffee.

We loaded our luggage into the trusty Renault Megane and started south. We made good time, once again enjoying the beauty of the Scottish countryside. The trees were still bare, but it was clear that spring was just around the corner.

Once we connected to the motorway, we made good time. “We may reach the hotel early enough to be able to unwind and relax a bit,” Kim said. But once again, luck was not on our side.

First, there was a terrible crash on the M1 motorway, closing it to traffic in both directions. We were stuck on the freeway for an hour before being able to exit. Then it took us another hour to crawl south to the next junction.

During this time, my upset stomach became worse, turning to nausea and stomach cramps. Plus, Kim began to get sick too. By the time we finally reached London — three hours behind schedule — we were both in bad shape. The 60-mile trip around the M25 ring road seemed to last an eternity.

Although we’d eaten very little all day, we simply climbed into bed and tried (without much success) to fall asleep.

The finaly tally from our rental car, which cost us $400 for the week.

Final Thoughts

I’d never rented a car for an extended period of time before this trip. I was a little apprehensive. It seemed expensive. In the end, though, I was glad we’d made the choice. Over the course of one week, we drove over one thousand miles across Britain. We enjoyed some great scenery, but even more than that, we enjoyed a lot of freedom. We were able to make up our itinerary as we went along.

Kim and I both found that we enjoyed our tour of the country much more than expected — especially the time in Scotland. We both feel like we ought to return sometime (probably during the summer or early autumn) to explore the Lake District and all of Scotland at a more leisurely pace.

For this trip, though, our time exploring Britain was over, and it was time to fly to Norway.

At the Scottish-English border on a cold, clear day in April

Paris 2013: In the Land of Wine and Cheese

Greetings from Paris! For almost a week, Kim and I have been exploring the city from an apartment near the Sentier metro stop. Every day, we walk down Rue Montorgueil, a bustling pedestrian thoroughfare filled with produce stands and fish shops and boulangeries. With all the people packed into cafés, it feels very much like Rue Cler (where Kris and I stayed in 2010), but with more average Parisians. And at night, if we mistakenly take the next street over, we can see sex shops and streetwalkers. Quite the contrast!

We’re actually very pleased with our apartment. It’s small but functional, and the location is perfect.

Kimberly, preparing to climb 667 steps to the second floor of the Eiffel Tower

When I was here three years ago, we spent a lot of time exploring the famous landmarks of Paris: the Louvre, the Eiffel Tower, the Arc de Triomphe, and so on. Kim and I have done some of that. We actually climbed the Eiffel Tower, for instance (something I didn’t do last time), and we made a quick tour of the Louvre (with an epic journey to locate the Dutch masters). But mostly we’ve done a lot of walking — and we’ve eaten a lot of wine and cheese.

Note: Kim had shoulder surgery three weeks before we left for this trip, which is a mixed blessing. We wouldn’t have been able to take so much time together to explore Paris and — eventually — London and Oslo if she weren’t required to take eight weeks off work. But the sore and healing shoulder is also a liability. It limits the things we can do. And on our way back from climbing the Eiffel Tower, she stumbled at the top of the stairs from the subway. She managed to not land on her shoulder, but she was still sore for days after.

Taking in the art at the Louvre

On most of my past trips, I’ve had a fairly clear agenda: I’ve known where I wanted to go and what I wanted to see. But when Nick and I traveled to Turkey last September, I had a hell of a lot of fun by not planning things. We sketched in where and when we wanted to be, but for the most part we just made things up as we went along. Because Kim and I both like to “go with the flow”, we decided to do the same sort of thing on this trip (with the notable exception of Norway, which is very planned).

Browsing the streets of Paris

As a result, we’ve spent our days in Paris just wandering the streets. When we find something that looks interesting, we stop to take a look. Some days we set out with a destination in mind, but we don’t always reach it. Yesterday, for instance, I wanted to visit the Orangerie (a museum of impressionist art) and the Arc de Triomphe. We didn’t do either. We stopped outside Notre Dame to sit in the sun, and then wandered again into the Latin Quarter where we fumbled our way through the alleys of shops and cafés. We stopped for crepes. We looked in shop windows. We bought a painting.

A small boy makes a donation to a Dixieland band playing in the Latin Quarter

Eventually we crossed the Seine to Champs-Élysées. We stopped on a side street for a glass of wine, and I was startled to realize that we’d managed to find the exact same restaurant where Kris and I had a miserable meal of lousy steaks three years ago. (The wine that Kim and I had this time wasn’t much better.)

A common sight on this trip: Me with my camera

In the evening, we celebrated my birthday with a delicious meal at Le Patio Provençal, a restaurant recommended to me by Nomadic Matt.

We had a great day today, too. We booked a wine and cheese tasting at O Chateau. As we’ve done so many times since arriving here last Thursday, we consumed a ton of wine and cheese.

Our hostess, Charlotte, served us five wines and five cheeses. The pairings were fantastic, especially the last two. For the record, we got to try:

A champagne (brut chardonnay) with brie.
A saumur (chenin blanc) with Sainte Maure de Touraine.
A brouilly/beaujolais (gamay) with Tome d’Auvergne.
A haut médoc/bourdeaux (cab/merlot blend) with Comté.
A monbazillac (semillon/sauv blanc) with Roquefort.

You’ll notice that I’ve listed the wines a couple of different ways. That’s because French wine is classified different than American wine. In the U.S., our wines are sold by grape varietal. We buy a cabernet sauvignon or a merlot or a chardonnay, for instance. That’s not how the French buy wines. They buy based on region: Bordeaux or Champagne or Beaujolais. (Actually, they buy by subregion or terroir.) The French feel that the place the grapes are grown has as much impact on the quality of the wine as the grapes themselves.

Anyhow, we had a lot of wine and cheese for lunch today.

Our cheeses today at O Chateau

Actually, I’m beginning to believe that Parisians are fueled by just three “nutrients”: wine, cheese, and bread. For the past week, that’s what I have been fueled by.

The day we arrived, we picked up some bread and goat cheese to eat for our breakfasts. A couple of times, we’ve eaten at Au Rocher de Cancale, where I’ve had wine and cheese. I’ve had wine and cheese for nearly every meal, as a matter of fact. You might think that after a week, the wine would be catching up with me, but it’s not the case. The cheese, on the other hand, is causing problems.

Thankfully, we’ll soon be moving on to lands where cheese is less plentiful. On Thursday morning, we’ll take a train across the English Channel, rent a car in London, and then gradually make our way north to Edinburgh. Maybe we’ll see Stonehenge or stop in Bath or catch a soccer match in Liverpool. We’re not sure. And you know what? We don’t care. We’re having a lot of fun just making things up as we go along.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, it’s time for dinner. I think maybe I’ll have some wine and cheese…

Meet Me in Ecuador in September

It’s no secret that I’ve made a lot of changes to my life over the past few years. I’ve made so many changes, in fact, that sometimes I feel like I’m somebody completely different. That’s not a bad thing. The challenge now is to s-l-o-w down, to enjoy the life I’ve worked so hard to create.

Often when I talk to people, they ask how I managed to make so many changes in such a short period of time. There are two key elements to this:

First, I decided to be completely honest and true to myself — and to others. Instead of doing what I thought others wanted me to do, I did what I wanted.

Second, I faced my fears and acted in spite of them. This is tied directly to the first point. In order to be true to yourself, you’ve got to confront the things that frighten you most.

For a while now, I’ve been prepping to start writing my second book. It’ll be a book about personal finance, but I hope to take a different approach than most money books. But there’s a nagging doubt at the back of my mind; part of me wonders if I shouldn’t write some sort of self-help/motivational book first.

To test the waters, I’ve begun thinking and writing more about psychology. And — to challenge one of my biggest fears — I’ve been speaking on the subject, too.

At last summer’s World Domination Summit, I spoke for 40 minutes on the art of personal transformation.

My talk about personal transformation from World Domination Summit 2012

At this summer’s World Domination Summit, I’ll be joining my friend Leo Babauta from Zen Habits to present a workshop on how to build confidence and destroy fear.

But I think the talk that excites me most is the one I’ll give later this year in Ecuador. Just after Labor Day, I’ll be joining three other folks to host a retreat outside Quito, Ecuador. We’ll welcome 25 people for a week of learning and laughter.

We’re billing this as a one-week chautauqua on freedom, wealth, and happiness. Here’s how the official website describes the event:

Please join J.D. Roth, Mr. Money Mustache, Jim Collins, and Cheryl Reed, each of whom have succeeded in designing their own lives of personal freedom. Through presentations, one-on-one sessions, and group discussions, they will share their knowledge and tools for how you can do the same.

Join us in Ecuador, one of the most bio-diverse countries in the world. You will stay at the award winning Arasha Rainforest Resort and Spa, considered a hot spot because of its virgin forest and biodiversity. It is here, on the equator, where you will design your plan to live a passionate life and take the steps to financial freedom.

My presentation will touch on personal finance, but it’ll really be an extension of the topic I’m talking about WDS. All of us have grand dreams and big ideas, but all too often we lack the courage to see them through. Plus, there’s Real Life. With family and friends and work and other obligations, who has the time to make dreams come true?

As we get older, we find we’re trapped by the desires and expectations of others. We feel locked into a life we no longer love. I plan to help participants explore how to build confidence and destroy fear. We’ll talk about how find freedom in an unfree world, about how to choose the road less traveled.

Most of all, we’ll explore the idea that it’s not only acceptable but absolutely
vital to put yourself and your interests first in life.

Plus, like each of the other presenters, I’ll be meeting one-on-one with attendees during the week.

I’ll admit that I was a bit skeptical about our ability to fill this retreat. I needn’t have been. We opened registration ten days ago, and already nineteen people have paid. Only six spots remain.

I’d love it if some of you were able to attend. If you’re free from the 7th to 14th of September and would like to spend a week learning about life while lounging in subtropical Ecuador, register now to join us. (And if you’ve got extra time and want to join me on a trip to the Galapagos, let me know. I’m doing this by myself after the end of the retreat, but I’d be happy to share the tour info with you so that you can join me.)

Am I scared about being one of the presenters at this chautauqua? Hell yes. But that’s the point. And past experience has taught me that by facing and overcoming my fears, I’ll be a better man.

Coffee Addict

Though I’ve long denied it, those who know me well tell me I’m a picky eater. It used to drive Kris crazy. When I started dating Kim, I told her I’d eat almost anything. It didn’t take her long to see that what I meant was I’d eat almost anything other than beer, coffee, mushrooms, and cruciferous vegetables.

Over the past year, I’ve made a conscious effort to face some of my food fears, and to overcome them. For instance, last May I started drinking beer, and now I actually enjoy it. (Beer is food, right?) I’ve also discovered the joys of kale and brussels sprouts. But perhaps my favorite new find is coffee. I started drinking coffee in August — tentatively at first — and am now a coffee addict.

I think the key to my conversion was starting with the good stuff. I was buying a bag of Stumptown Coffee for my brother’s birthday, and the barista offered me a free cup. I declined at first, but he was insistent. “Do you like tea?” he asked. I do. “Then try this coffee,” he said, serving me a cup brewed from Ethiopian beans. I was surprised to find I actually enjoyed it. Over the next few weeks, I tasted Kim’s coffee whenever she had it. Gradually my coffee aversion faded. In fact, I came to crave the stuff.

Now quality coffee is one of my favorite parts of the day. Every morning, I roll out of bed and go to the kitchen, where I pour about two ounces of grounds into my Chemex beaker. I boil a kettle of water, which I then pour over the grounds to produce several cups of awesomeness.

The trouble, of course, is that quality coffee is expensive. Some of it is crazy expensive. Stumptown has some great roasts that cost $30 per pound. Yikes. The local organic grocery has some good blends, but they still costs about a buck an ounce. That works out to roughly $2 per day to feed our coffee habit.

Note: Because I like to try new coffee, I just signed up for the subscription coffee service from BrewPony, which promises to supply quality Portland coffee on a monthly basis. Sounds like fun to me!

Kim is frugal by nature, and she hates how much we spend on coffee. But she also hates the cheap stuff. It’s a dilemma. But she’s come up with a way to tackle the problem: She wants to buy green coffee beans and roast them herself. There’s a place near my condo that offers classes in coffee roasting, and I think we’re going to take one. Who knows? Maybe in a few months, we’ll be enjoying great coffee that we’ve roasted ourselves — and saving money in the process.

To be honest, all I care about is that the caffeine continues to flow.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need another cup of joe…

Postscript: The next food fear I’ll face? Mushrooms. I hate mushrooms. Kim loves them. To give her a treat (and to give myself the best possible introduction to these vile fungi), we’ll soon have dinner at The Joel Palmer House, a local restaurant that specializes in mushrooms.

Ask the Readers: Finding Personal Health Insurance?

Today, I’m going to do something I’ve never done before. I’m going to use this blog as a means to do research for a forthcoming article for Entrepreneur magazine.

Your Money

I’ve been writing the monthly “Your Money” column for Entrepreneur for 2-1/2 years now, and it’s a lot of fun. It’s a chance for me to hone in subjects with laser-like focus. If you’ve read my stuff at Get Rich Slowly, some of the articles might be familiar. But I also get to cover new topics (like building a team of financial advisors).

The column is also fun because it’s a vastly different process than the one I’m used to. With blogging, there’s almost instant gratification. For instance, I’m writing this piece at 8:12 on a Thursday morning. It’ll be finished and online in about ten minutes. Nobody else will review it; I’ll just post it and let readers respond. Which you will. I’ll have feedback in half an hour.

With the magazine, however, there’s a long turnaround. My current article, for instance, is on peer-to-peer lending. I started doing research for that piece in early October, at the end of my trip to Turkey. I submitted the piece in early November. My editor polished the piece, it went to print, and it finally found its way online at the end of February. There’s one comment on the article. This article about that article may get dozens of comments.

So, as I say, it’s a different beast.

Anyhow, this is all a tangent. The real reason I’m writing today is to recruit your help for the article that will appear in the June issue of the magazine. I’m writing about how to find health insurance when you’re on your own.

Personal Health Insurance

There are a lot of perks to being an entrepreneur. When you work for yourself, you control your destiny: you pursue a project of passion while setting your own hours and working without a boss. But there are drawbacks too. Sure, you set your own hours, but you’re often working far more than you ever imagined. Many entrepreneurs are lonely, too, spending most of their days in isolation. And let’s not forget medical insurance!

In fact, I’d argue that medical insurance is currently one of the biggest barriers to entry for would-be entrepreneurs. I have several friends who are ready to leave their jobs to start their own businesses, but they can’t. They can’t afford the more than $1000 per month in medical insurance for their families.

Here’s a direct quote I jotted down from one friend last week:

If it weren’t for health insurance, people would be free to do so many things. My husband is tied to his job because we can’t afford to be without coverage. Even with health insurance, we pay a shitload of money for medical costs.

For many families, health insurance costs as much as housing.

In my own case, I’ve had to make some tough choices. When I was married, I was covered under Kris’s health insurance. I took it for granted. Now that I’m on my own, I carry an individual policy with a high deductible. That protects me from catastrophic crises (like a car crash), but I pay out of pocket for routine care. And I’m discovering that even routine care can cost a fortune.

Last week, for instance, I visited my allergist to discuss my rampant hay fever. The half-hour office visit cost me $250.50. The two-minute “surgery” to send a fiber-optic cable through my sinus passages cost $530. And the nasal spray the doctor prescribed to fight my symptoms cost $138.32 for fifteen doses. All told, I spent nearly $1000 to get temporary relief from my tree allergy. Next time, I’ll probably choose to suffer.

Or maybe it’s time to change my policy. I pay $144 a month, but I receive almost nothing in return. Maybe I need to bite the bullet, to pay $300 a month (or more) but have comfort in the knowledge that it won’t cost me $1000 every time I need to get allergy relief.

Share Your Story

So, here’s how you can help me. Do you pay for your own health insurance? Have you in the past? What sorts of advice can you offer other folks who need to do the same thing? If you’re willing to share your story (or to help others find affordable options), leave a comment on this article. And if you’re willing to let me chat with you for my article, be sure you use your real email address when commenting so that I can contact you.

I think there are a lot of folks out there who struggle with affordable health insurance, and this is a chance for us to help them. Let’s do it!

Note: Past GRS articles on this subject include Hunting for Health Insurance (which chronicles my search for health insurance last spring) and Health Insurance Options for the Self-Employed.

The Relationship Between Gratitude, Abundance, and Acquisition

My last post on combatting clutter brought a lot of interesting comments and several great suggestions. For instance:

Liz wrote: “We keep a large plastic tote in our living room and we drop items that are to be donated inside. Once the tote is full, we take the contents to Goodwill.” Great idea!

DH (who has been reading my blogs for years) suggested coping with clutter is a mental exercise: “[Becoming] highly organized and clutter-free or whatever…will never fully shield us from that underlying level of anxiety you speak of, JD. That’s just a myth that sells books and blogs. The key to dealing with the underlying anxiety is to transform the material of the mind first.” Commenters Moom and Lucille agreed.

Andrew shared a William Morris quote: “Have nothing in your house that you do not know to be useful, or believe to be beautiful.”

Dennis hit upon something I’ve learned over the past few years: “Invest in quality items. The few possessions I do own are of very high quality and will ultimately last many years with proper care.” KSR agreed.

And Mrs. Money Mustache provided a tip that I’ve been trying to put into place here at my new home: “Everything must have its place. If every object in your house has a place where it lives, then clutter is virtually gone.” Yes, indeed, this is true.

Perhaps the most insightful comment, however, came by email. After nearly a year together, Kim knows me pretty well. She noted — not for the first time — that my problem isn’t clutter. It’s acquisition. She wrote:

What I’ve witnessed is what I would call an aquisition problem. I’ve been very proud and impressed with your ability to let go of “stuff”, but you still bring home little things constantly, and I would say more often than pretty much any one I’ve ever been around.

You know what? She’s right. What’s more, this is merely one symptom of a deeper problem in my life. As my therapist noted in December, I operate from a scarcity mindset. Many of my decisions are predicated on the premise that I won’t have enough: not enough food, not enough stuff, not enough love. As a result, I’ve tended toward hoarding (ever since I was a boy). And of course, this leads to a compulsion to acquire stuff.

For the most part, I’ve managed to shake this scarcity mindset with regards to relationships. I’ve shifted to an abundance mindset instead. Maybe it’s time to make the same shift in other aspects of my life. Hell, forget “maybe”. It is time that I made this shift.

Early this morning, I had a long chat with my friend Jodi Ettenberg, who’s near the end of a sojourn in Vietnam. Among other things, we talked about attitude and gratitude. We took turns sharing how lucky we feel, how grateful we are for the lives we lead. She may not have a lot of money, but she’s been able to travel the world for the past five years, eating and exploring and interacting with people. I, on the other hand, have a lovely home, a fantastic girlfriend, and work I love. We’re grateful for our lives of abundance.

As I ran errands this afternoon, I thought about the relationship between gratitude and abundance. For a long time, I hated the world “abundance”. I associated it with the myth of the law of attraction. But over the past few weeks, I’ve come to realize that there really is such a thing as an abundance mindset, and it’s very much tied to the ability to be grateful for what you have. As I pondered gratitude and abundance, I had an epiphany.

If an attitude of gratitude can change the way I view relationships with people, then maybe it can shift how I view my relationship with stuff. The next time I feel compelled to buy something — a candle snuffer, a drink muddler, a floor lamp — I need to take a moment to be grateful for the things I already have. I suspect that by doing so, I just might be able to put an end to my problem with ~~clutter~~ acquiring things.

It worked today, anyhow. One of the errands on my list was a trip to Costco. I need batteries, and I want lots of other stuff. But while waiting at the DMV, I took a few moments to think about all of the good things I have, and to ask if I really needed to go to Costco. The answer, unsurprisingly, was no. I stopped by the grocery store on the way home to pick up a few necessities, but today at least I was able to keep from bringing more stuff into my home.

Combatting Clutter

For years, I’ve been fighting a battle with stuff.

To me, there are two types of stuff. On a basic level, all of the things you own make up the stuff in your life. But you need some of these things. You need bedding and toiletries and dishes and cleaning supplies. The battle I’ve been fighting is with the stuff beyond the basics — all of the toys and gadgets and souvenirs and decorations and miscellaneous possessions that fill up my space and life. This is the stuff that’s been driving me crazy.

I first realized I had a problem with stuff when I began to travel about five years ago. I’m a light packer. When I travel, I take little with me. I’m able to survive with what I can lug around in a single carry-on suitcase. Living with only few things for several weeks can be liberating, and when I return home I’m often overwhelmed by the sheer volume of things I own.

In recent years, I’ve slowly been shedding my stuff. I’ve purged thousands of books. I’ve donated much of my wardrobe to charity. When Kris and I divorced, I intentionally took as little as possible with me.

All the same, my recent move to a new place reinforced that I still have a lot of stuff. Maybe not as much as most people, but more than I want. I have boxes of books and comics. I have stacks of CDs and DVDs. And I still have too many wires and gadgets. So, as I’ve unpacked over the past three weeks, I’ve done my best to thin things as I go.

But I need some stuff. And there’s other stuff that I want. Kim and I have been drafting an ongoing list of stuff I ought to acquire in order to make this place more livable. Here’s the real-life, honest-to-goodness list of stuff I want right now:

wireless speakers for the television
a candle snuffer
a wine rack
a drink muddler
a larger cocktail shaker
a citrus juicer
a mop and a bucket
a fire extinguisher
a floor lamp

Now obviously some of this stuff is useful and important. Without a mop and a bucket, my floors are going to get filthy. But a candle snuffer? Is that a needful thing? Or is it really, truly just stuff? Where do I draw the line?

I don’t yet know where to draw the line, but I’m beginning to get an idea.

Just the other day, for the first time in my adult life, every room in my house was clean and tidy. All of my stuff was put away. It felt awesome. My physical environment was free of clutter, and that made it so that my mental environment was free of clutter. It helped to reduce the underlying level of anxiety that I’ve come to realize is always present in my life.

I’ve decided that one of my goals will be to maintain this sense of inner calm by being certain that my home always has an outer calm. I want things to be neat and tidy. But in order to accomplish this, I can only have so much stuff. It can’t be pouring out of the closets and cupboards, overflowing onto desks and counters and tables and chairs.

I’ve also re-committed to pursuing quality. While sorting through the things I own, I realized that I have a lot of cheap crap (purchased in an effort to be “frugal”). Sometimes cheap crap is good. If I’m not going to use an item much, there’s no sense paying top dollar for it. However, for the things I use often, it makes sense for me to take the time to find the best solution, to pay a little more to get the best experience.

In short, I want to own fewer things, but I want the things I own to be of better quality.

I suspect I’ll be waging this war on stuff until the day I die. I don’t know of many people who ever win it. (The few I do know who seem to have won the war on stuff have done so through drastic measures. Tammy and Logan, for instance, won the war by moving into a tiny house. I applaud their victory, but that’s not something I’m willing to do for myself.)

I’m curious: How many of you feel like you’re fighting a war on stuff? How many of you are constantly wrestling with physical (and mental) clutter? What techniques have you found to help you fight the battle? What does not work? And do any of you feel like you’ve actually achieved a lasting victory?

Home Sweet Home

Moving always takes more out of me than I think it will. It takes more time and more energy than I budget for the experience.

Packed and ready to go…

Ten days ago, I received the keys for my condo. Since then, my life has been a whirlwind of activity. The morning after I got the keys, I recruited help to move my stuff from my apartment to my new home. Friends like Adam Baker and Becca Borawski did an awesome job of hauling heavy boxes (full of books) and heavy furniture down four floors and then up four floors. I’d only planned on five hours for the move but it took eight. (And I didn’t get everything done that I’d planned.)

Becca, Baker, and Kim helping with the move…

Kim — who was fantastic at filling in the gaps during Saturday’s move — then helped me unpack boxes on Sunday. We also took a trip to Ikea to pick up a few pieces of furniture. By the end of the weekend, we had a functional kitchen and living room, plus a mattress on the floor of the bedroom.

The first week in the new place felt a little bit like being in college again…

All last week, I worked on the condo. I continued to unpack boxes. Friends helped me pick up odd pieces of furniture here and there. On Tuesday night, my cousin Nick helped me move and install a washer and dryer. Almost. The dryer turned out to be more of a challenge than we’d anticipated. In fact, it’s still not completely functional (though I hope it’ll be usable by the end of today).

As Monday turned to Tuesday turned to Wednesday turned to Thursday, I raced to have my place clean and ready for a romantic Valentine’s dinner. Fortunately, Kim’s expectations were low. She wanted something simple, and that’s what she got. I ran out of time to have everything ready, so we ate our steak and salad at the bar.

The living room is now mostly finished…

Over the weekend, Kim continued to help me unpack boxes and put together furniture. Now here it is on Monday morning, and I’m still not completely moved in. The kitchen, living room, master bedroom, and master bedroom are finished, which is comforting. But the laundry room still doesn’t work (and I’m running out of clean clothes), the office isn’t complete (I need to print some stuff but can’t find my spare toner cartridge), and the back bedroom is filled with boxes of books. Plus, I still have a bunch of stuff at Kris’s place that I need to move.

The bedroom in a usable state. Still need to decorate, though.

I’m content, though. Even though things are still in disarray, my new condo feels like home. I love the condo itself, and I love the location. I’ve already hosted more people here in one week than I did during a year of living in the apartment.

On Friday morning, Kim and I strolled in the sunshine down the multi-use trail that’s right outside my door. We walked to the wildlife sanctuary, then up the hill to the next neighborhood over. We stopped at the grocery store and the hardware store. She stopped to pick up lunch at the Thai place. We talked about our plans for the future.

Living here is going to be fun!

How to Travel the World (Without Spending a Lot of Money)

This is a guest post from Matt Kepnes, who writes about travel and more at Nomadic Matt. His advice has been featured in The New York Times, CNN, The Guardian UK, Lifehacker, Budget Travel, BBC, and Yahoo! Finance among others. Kepnes is the author of the just-published How to Travel the World on $50 a Day.

When I first stumbled across Get Rich Slowly, I figured J.D. didn’t travel much. Or if he did, he didn’t mention it often on the site.

But as we’ve gotten to know each other, I’ve been excited to discover that he travels frequently. He’s hiked the Inca Trail, spent time in Turkey, and I hear he’s making big plans for a European trip with his girlfriend at the end of March.

As a travel writer and someone whose personal mission is to get others to travel more, I’m excited. Seeing people travel makes me smile.

Crossing the 4950-meter pass near Salcantay

J.D., crossing a pass near Salcantay, Peru

Blinded by Marketing

Since I write about travel, I field a lot of questions about the practicality of seeing the world. People always tell me, “I want to travel more, but I can’t afford it. It’s too expensive.” But you know what? It’s not.

Forget what you’ve read in magazines and seen on TV. Travel can be very inexpensive. The reason you believe it’s unaffordable is because of marketing. Giant resorts have advertising budgets to match; small hotels do not. If all you’ve ever heard of is posh resorts, that’s what you’re going to believe travel is about. It’s hard to unlearn a lifetime of mass marketing.

Discouraged by the perceived cost, many people don’t travel. But if you really stop to think about your destinations, you can see they don’t have to be expensive. After all, locals don’t hundreds each day to live at your desired destination. (Just as you don’t spent tons of money to live your everyday life.)

Just like me, J.D. and thousands of others have found that when you make traveling a priority, instead of being discouraged by prices, you can work around them. In doing so, you get to see behind the curtain and discover travel isn’t expensive.

How to Make Travel Affordable

What are your priorities in life? Maybe it’s travel, maybe it’s gardening. Whatever your priorities, don’t you do everything in your power to fulfill those desires? You cut out expenses in other areas of your life, rearrange your schedule, research the hell out of it, and do whatever it takes to make your dreams happen. You make your dreams happen.

That kind of prioritizing is what happens when people want to travel more. (J.D. would call this conscious spending.)

“Well,” you might say. “That’s easier said than done, Matt. Flights and everything still cost money.”

You’re right. Even if travel is your highest priority, without money and a plan, it’ll never happen. To make that dream come true more quickly, here are five financial tips to make your next trip happen sooner.

Separate needs from wants
Before you travel, you’re going to need to save. Nothing in life is free. There are many ways to cut expenses, but one thing that really helped me was separating my wants from my needs. A need is my electric bill; a want is Starbucks. By categorizing my expenses, I could cut out the unnecessary expenditures and really watch my travel fund grow. If I didn’t need it, I didn’t spend money on it. Before I knew it, I’d saved enough money to travel.

A reader of mine recently saved over $14,000 while working a minimum wage job as a fry cook. If he can do that, so can you.

Think outside the box
Want to visit Europe but can’t afford Paris or Italy? Head to Eastern Europe, where prices are cheaper. Want a tast of the tropics but Fiji’s too far and Costa Rica’s too touristy? Head to Nicaragua, which has beautiful weather and lower prices. Visit Cambodia instead of Thailand, or see South Korea instead of Japan.

There are always cheaper and safer alternatives to the world’s top travel destinations. We think of the big names first because they’re always talked about; there are just as many great places out there that you haven’t heard of and don’t have the crowds.

Game the system
Travel hacking is the best way to make luxury trips affordable. Travel brands offer so many ways to gain loyalty points that you can easily rack up tens of thousands without ever having to travel. This is an oft-discussed method of traveling but with good reason: It works extremely well.

If you really want to make your next trip happen sooner, get a travel-related credit card, sign up for a frequent flier and hotel loyalty system, and accumulate points like there’s no tomorrow. Moreover, don’t forget to sign up for newsletters so you can find out when there is an offer of 1000 points for taking a survey. Good resources for finding the latest point deals are:

J.D.’s note: Matt mentioned that I’ll soon be traveling to Europe, and he’s right. One way I’m going to keep costs down is by booking my flights using air miles I acquired by applying for a credit card two years ago. Another way is by using Airbnb to book lodging.

Think local
Travel doesn’t always need to be to some far off and exotic destination. Travel, to me, is about getting outside your comfort zone and exploring what you’ve never seen before. That could mean heading to Fiji or visiting the state next door.

If you don’t have a lot of time, driving somewhere for the weekend can give you a travel fix and still allow you to see something new. The U.S. is such a diverse country geographically that you don’t have to go far to feel like you’re somewhere entirely new.

Depend on the kindness of strangers
There are many hospitality websites that help travelers find free places to stay, as well as free guided tours around their destination. The most common are:

Couchsurfing is probably the most popular, but each of these websites connects you with locals who will give you a free place to stay. If you’re not quite comfortable with that, you can still use the sites to arrange meet-ups and plan social activities with locals.

Staying a while longer in one place? Try house sitting. Have a home? Swap it with someone in the destination you are going to visit! Both methods allow you to eliminate accommodation expenses and save more money.

Final Destination

Traveling is about goals. Like everything else in life, without a good plan, you’ll never reach your goals. My hope is that you can see there are many ways around the “high prices” of travel. It’s easier than you think to make travel happen. These five tips alone can cut hundreds of dollars from your trip — and they’re just a start.

I used to work an entry level job but I prioritized travel and made it happen. J.D. makes travel happen. Every year, millions of others make it happen. Now, I want you to take these tips and make it happen too!

House Hunting, part two: Finding a Place

It’s going to be an exciting and busy week for me.

Several weeks ago, I mentioned that I was looking to buy a new place to live. After a year of living in an apartment, I had a good idea of the place I wanted to find. Plus, the Portland real estate market seemed to have hit bottom — and had even begun to climb.

Throughout the fall, I worked with my real-estate agent, Andi (a former Get Rich Slowly reader). While she and I focused on finding a property that appealed to me, I struggled to find financing. Because interest rates were so low, I wanted to obtain a mortgage.

Ultimately, I gave up the idea of financing a home purchase. Despite the fact that I had ample cash in savings, no bank would give me a loan. I didn’t have enough income to qualify. If I wanted to buy, I’d have to pay cash. It took some time, but eventually I realized I was willing to do so.

Feels Like Home

During my first three months of house hunting, I’d seen one place that really appealed to me (but it sold in 24 hours, and while I was on the road), and had failed to find financing. It was frustrating.

After Christmas break, Kim and I spent a Sunday with Andi looking at condos in northwest Portland. The following week, Andi and I found a few more to explore. There were a couple I liked, but I didn’t fall in love with anything.

On my last day in Houston, I woke to find a listing I liked: a condo in a building where I’d already seen one unit. The first unit had appealed to me, but Andi and Kim both noted that it was directly underneath one of Portland’s major bridges, a bridge currently undergoing construction — and scheduled to be under construction for the next two years. “That’d be a deal-breaker if I were buying the place,” Kim said.

The new place was on the opposite side of the building. Plus, it was on the top floor. Plus, it was a little bigger. “I like this condo,” I told my host in Houston. “I’ll have to look at it when I get back to Portland.”

The real issue was that I’d mentally decided that I was only willing to spend $300,000. When I thought I could get financing, my budget was $400,000, but because I’d have to pay in cash, I’d mentally adjusted my price range. The new place was listed for $329,000. I decided to take a look anyhow.

The condo felt right almost immediately. Though staged in a plain and simple manner, it felt like home. I loved the view of downtown Portland (distant though it was) and the view of the river. I liked the layout. I liked certain features in the kitchen and bathroom. Most of all, there was something about the energy of the place that just felt right to me. “Let’s make an offer,” I told Andi.

Making an Offer

We spent a day trying to decide on a figure. I felt like $329,000 was a little too high. Plus, I’m a frugal fellow. We decided to submit a purchase price of $310,000.

As we were drafting our offer, we got word that somebody else was making a bid. “Crap,” I said. “What do we do?”

“That’s up to you,” Andi told me. “But in a competitive situation, you don’t want to be seen as lowballing.” In the end, we offered $325,000.

Our offer was refused.

Andi called me back with the news. “The sellers want ‘best and final’ offers by noon tomorrow,” she said.

“What does that mean?” I asked.

“It means they have at least two of you bidding on the place. Maybe more. And they want you to give them their best price now.”

I spent that evening doing a ton of research.

How much did other units in the building sell for?
What about other properties in the neighborhood?
What were prices like for other condos in other parts of Portland?
What could $325,000 buy me in a nice part of town? A lousy part of town?
What about $350,000?

I called Kim and talked things out with her. I also called my friend Mike, who owns investment properties in town, and asked his opinion. Then I sat down and worked out numbers. How much was I willing to pay for this place? What sort of difference did it make that I was paying cash instead of financing? (When you pay cash for a property, you’re essentially shifting your investment from one asset class to another. That’s a very important distinction.)

Ultimately, I decided I was willing to pay $342,000, so that’s what I offered.

My offer was accepted.

Failed Negotiations

From there, things got a little interesting. The home inspection was mostly glowing. We did not perform an appraisal because the sellers balked at that requirement when we submitted the offer. After we’d combed through the reports and documents, we found a handful of things that bugged us. (Plus, we were cranky about some sleight-of-hand regarding a storage unit.)

As the deadline for my decision approached last week, we took everything we knew about the property into account and reduced our offer to $336,000. The sellers refused to budge. They exercised a “take it or leave it attitude”. I asked Andi what that meant.

“We believe it means that the other offer (or offers) the sellers received were very near your offer,” she told me. “They don’t care if you back out because they have a backup offer that’s just as good. In fact, I think it’s likely that the backup offer may have been better. In any event, it’s almost certainly at least $336,000.”

In true J.D. fashion, I agonized over what to do. I could afford $342,000 instead of $329,000. My research indicated that the condo was worth the higher price. Plus, there was at least one other offer that supported that valuation, as well. Still, it bugged me to have to pay a premium for the place.

In the end, I elected to stick to my guns. I loved the condo, and I especially loved the location. I agreed to pay the $342,000.

Closing the Deal

On Tuesday, I’ll sign the documents for the purchase of the condo. On Friday, I should take possession.

It’s all very exciting, but it’s also a little scary. After months of moving in slow motion, the final part of the process happened at warp speed. “You don’t seem that excited about your new place,” Kim told me last Thursday. I am excited, but I’m also overwhelmed. I don’t feel like I’ve had time to process everything. I’ve done a lot of second-guessing myself.

But I also realize that if this doesn’t work out, it’s not a $342,000 mistake. The money hasn’t evaporated. It’s simply been shifted from stocks (which seem to be high right now) to real estate (which seems to be low right now). If there’s any mistake here, it’s on the order of $5000 or $10,000, not $342,000. (That’s still a lot of money, but not an obscene amount.) Besides, I’m certain there’s another buyer out there who’s willing to pay $336,000 for the place, and that gives me comfort.