Fun

There are 54 posts filed in Fun (this is page 4 of 6).

Back to the Future

Kris has been pestering me for two-and-a-half years to hook up the VCR. When we moved from Canby to Oak Grove, we bought a new television. For some reason, the VCR didn’t get reconnected. (That reason is probably related to Netflix.)

Although we watch a lot of films on DVD, we still have many, many videotapes. It doesn’t make any sense to replace most of these, and yet without the VCR hooked up, they’re worthless. I’ve been buying films on DVD when we want to watch them. This is dumb.

Finally, Kris had enough. Top on my list of New Years chores was “hook up the VCR”. I was dreading it. I’m not an A/V guy. (That’s Jeff.) I figured it would take me half an hour and much cursing to get things to work.

Imagine my surprise when the process actually took all of thirty seconds. I’d already done most of the work at some previous time. (Why hadn’t I finished it?) All I needed to do was plug things in and test a tape. It worked like a charm.

Kris spent her New Years Day watching videos: The Joy Luck Club, Elizabeth, Two Girls and a Sailor. (The latter is an old June Allyson flick featuring a song that Kris likes to bellow from time-to-time: “The Young Man With a Horn”.) I’m sure it’s just a matter of time before she digs out Anne of Green Gables. I’m glad to have done this, though — it makes her happy.

And meanwhile I can go downstairs to play Wii bowling. I’m regularly scoring 200+ now and have a rank of “pro”. (My high score is 257.) I can get about seven strikes per game, but I can’t string together any more than that. I’m actually very curious to bowl for real this Saturday. My normal score is ~155. Will my weeks of Wii bowling help my score or hinder it? Stay tuned. (And for some real fun, watch this video of a perfect game in Wii bowling.)

Bonus: Colbert vs. Pelosi in Wii boxing.

Okay. One more:

Nintendo Wii: First Impressions

I’ve been a PC gamer for nearly thirty years. (I started as a young boy on an Apple II.) Recently I’ve grown away from gaming (except for World of Warcraft). I owned a Nintendo Gamecube for a while, but traded it on craigslist for a digital camera. But ever since I first heard reports about the Nintendo Wii last May, I’ve coveted one. I saved some money explicitly to purchase a system on the day it was released.

Last Saturday, after our college reunion, I drove to the Oregon City Fred Meyer to buy a Wii at midnight. I didn’t get one. I was 77th in line and the store only had 75 units. So I got out of bed on Sunday morning at 4:30 to stand in line at the Oak Grove Fred Meyer. This time I was 9th — I got one.

I only played for a few hours yesterday, but that was enough for me to fall in love with the Wii. I think Kris even liked it. Here are the four games I own and my initial impression of each:

  • Wii Sports — This game is included with the system, and does a fine job of showcasing the revolutionary controllers. The sports themselves are crude representations, but it doesn’t matter because Wii Sports is all about the gameplay. Here’s how you serve a ball in Wii tennis: you flick the controller up to toss the ball, and then you swing the controller over your head like a tennis racket. You don’t press any buttons. To bowl, you perform a bowling motion. For boxing, you attach a secondary controller and you throw punches, just as in real life. It’s actually quite a workout.
  • Super Monkey Ball — This is primarily meant to be a “party game”. I only played it in single-player mode. Have you ever played one of those “marble in a maze” type games, where you have to tilt a board to get a marble or BB to travel through it? That’s what Super Monkey Ball is like, except you’re tilting your Wii controller to guide a monkey in a ball to collect bananas. This has potential.
  • Zelda — Zelda is an ongoing Nintendo franchise about a young man in a mystical kingdom who has many adventures. This game is getting rave reviews, and it intrigues me, but it’s a little overwhelming. It’s almost too freeform for me. I’m taking it in bite-size chunks, but I’m worried that it’s not going to be as fun as Zeldas of former years. (Plus, I can’t get the darned horse to jump over fences!)
  • Marvel Ultimate Alliance — The only true dud so far. Maybe I need to give it more of a chance. You’d think I’d be eager to control my favorite superheroes, but I have no idea what I’m doing to make Thor fight or the Human Torch shoot fire. My presence seems superfluous except to move the characters around the screen. They all fight (and win) without me. I’ve already posted to craigslist hoping to trade this game for something else.

So far, the Nintendo Wii is a lot of fun, especially Wii Sports. Here’s a system that doesn’t emphasize graphics or technology or shooting and killing. It emphasizes fun. The wireless controllers look like remote controls and contain built-in motion sensors. This opens up an entire new world for gameplay. I’m eager to see how other games take advantage of this unique control system.

Nintendo is marketing the Wii as a gaming system for people who don’t play games, and I think they’re onto something. Kris has never been much of a gamer, but she agreed to play a round of tennis with me yesterday. She beat me, and had fun doing it. Later she beat me at boxing (which kind of bruised my ego). Later still, she killed me at bowling — she scored 180 and I only scored 88. Yikes! (Tonight, just before I posted this entry, I beat her at baseball twice in a row, so I’m not completely inept.)

One final note is that playing a game on the Wii requires a lot more activity than playing a game on another system. For Wii Sports, you need a clear space in front of the television so that you have freedom to move around, to swing your controller. (I’m not sure we’re going to have enough room for four people to play doubles tennis.) A few rounds of boxing is actually enough to get my heart rate up. This might be the first videogame system that helps kids lose weight instead of gain it.

Crocodile Hunter Jokes

I can only justify this entry by reminding you that after Steve Irwin’s death, I was touched and saddened.

Enough of that.

Today we have Crocodile Hunter jokes collected from around the internet. (Inspired by this AskMetafilter thread.) They’re all variations on a theme. If you think you might be offended by these, you should go look at kittens.

In a recent interview Steve Irwin was asked what his favorite TV program was. “Thunderbirds“, he replied, “But Stingray will always have a special place in my heart.”

Guess who’s singing at Steve Irwin’s funeral? Sting.

Steve Irwin’s Australia Zoo is now serving stingray. It’s Expensive, but Steve reckons “It’s to die for!”

Q: How many croc hunters does it take to capture a sting-ray?
A: Apparently more than one.

What were Steve Irwin’s favorite sunglasses? Ray Bans.

Did you hear that steve irwin died like he lived? With animals in his heart.

After Steve Irwin’s death we discovered Terri Irwin is pregnant. If it’s a boy, she’ll name him Ray — if it’s a girl, she’ll name her Barb!

How many respected biologists have been killed by stingrays? None.

Did you hear about Steve Irwin’s tombstone? It reads ‘Ray Sting Peace’.

What’s the difference between the Croc Hunter and Princess Di?
He brought his own camera crew.

And for the grand finale: Norm McDonald on The Daily Show.

Who knew Norm was so funny?

Okay, we can go back to being respectful now…

Sesame Street Video Clips

Update: Foldedspace reader Dennis has found a popularly-requested video. Here’s Loaf of bread, a container of milk and a stick of butter. Thanks, Dennis!

Update #2: Dutch has posted a bunch of YouTube clips for toddlers, including what seems to be additional Sesame Street clips. Right-click and open in a new tab, folks. You’ll want to go there next…

I state quite confidently that this is the best entry I’ve made in five years of weblogging. Go away if you have work things to get done. This is an enormous time-waster.

Below you’ll find a fantastic collection of Sesame Street video clips. These are great. I remember many of these from when I was a kid. I’ve tried to organzize them as best I can. If you know of more Muppet/Sesame Street clips, please let me know.

Let’s start with a song we all know by heart: “one two three FOUR five, six seven eight NINE ten, eleven twelve…”

Next we have a random selection of number and alphabet clips, as well as random skits:
Letters versus numbers.
Telephone rock
Look at this
The alligator king and his seven sons
Yakety yak
I remember liking this one as a kid: sounds
My martian cutie (number nine)
Jake the snake — body parts
King Minus
Fishing for the alphabet
Animal department store elevator
Song about riding the subway.
The rhyming song
Count it higher
Robert DeNiro imagines he’s Elmo (the spawn of Satan)
For Kris: the mad goat
Funny farm
The ladybug picnic
The number painter (and Stockard Channing! — I always loved this)
Mahna Mahna
We all live in a capital I
Choosing a national bird (hilarious!)
The villain in the panama hat

How about a collection of popular songs done Sesame Street-style?
Johnny Cash and Big Bird: Don’t Take Your Ones to Town”
R.E.M. and the Monsters: “Furry Happy Monsters”
Stevie Wonder: “1-2-3”
Ray Charles (and Patrick Stewart?!?): The Alphabet Song”
The Beetles: “Letter B”
Norah Jones (and that spawn of Satan, Elmo): “Don’t Know Y”
“Born to Add” (minus Bruce Springsteen)

For Jeff — the ‘yip yip’ Martians:
The Martians meet a telephone
The Martians meet a computer

Guy Smiley
The Remembering Game
Beat the Time
Mystery Guest

Oscar
It’s Not Easy Being Green
I Love Trash

Grover
Grover is surprised
Grover examines Kermit’s teeth
Grover’s echo
Grover takes a bath
Grover takes a day off
Grover goes to bed
Grover the waiter: big or small?
The monster in the mirror
Grover and the butterfly

Cookie Monster
Disco Cookie
Casey McPhee
C is for Cookie!
Cookie Monster raps about healthy food (boo! sell-out!)
The mystery box (with Kermit)
Rhyming (with Kermit)
Cookie steals Ernie’s cupcakes
Cookie steals Ernie’s pillow
Cookie and Ernie sing about D
One of these things is not like the other
Eatin’ Cookie (a parody of “Makin’ Whoopee”)
Six cookies
Monsterpiece Theater: Chariots of Fur
Monsterpiece Theater: The King and I
Monsterpiece Theater: Twelve Angry Men

My favorite has always been Kermit
It’s Not Easy Being Green
A-B-C-D-E-F-Cookie Monster (very, very cute)
The mystery box (with Cookie Monster)
Rhyming (with Cookie Monster)
Muppet News Flash: Santa Claus
Muppet News Flash: The Six Dollar Man
Muppet News Flash: Cinderella
Muppet News Flash: The Beanstalk
Muppet News Flash: The Wrong Seven Dwarves

And now for the grand finale, a collection of Bert and Ernie videos!
Bert and Ernie go fishing
Ernie does the laundry
Bert’s favorite number
Ernie can’t sleep
Bert can’t sleep
Bert and Ernie remember (and can’t sleep).
The ‘la la la’ song (This is a classic.)
Bert is locked out
Artwork by Ernie
Ernie and the chocolate cake
Ernie and Bert at the beach
Ernie goes rock hunting
Bert and Ernie explore a pyramid
Bert’s brother, Bart
Ernie quizzes Bert
Bert and Ernie play tag
Ernie breaks the cookie jar
Ernie has a banana in his ear (One of my all-time favorites.)
Bert and Ernie and the ice cream man
Bert and the National Association of W Lovers
Cookie steals Ernie’s cupcakes
Cookie steals Ernie’s pillow
Cookie and Ernie sing about D
Rubber Duckie!
Ernie and Lefty
Lefty and the painting
The broken ukelele
Natalie Portman (hubba and hubba) and Elmo (spawn of Satan) play the princess and the elephant

And, finally, the Muppet tribute to Jim Henson: Just One Person.

If you love these video clips, check out the complete first season of The Muppet Show, which is now available on DVD. (Also, this Songs From the Street boxed set features many of the songs above. Teach your children the songs you love!)

After watching some of these, I groused about Bert: “Bert is so lame. Who likes Bert?” “I like Bert,” mumbled Kris. “Why? How can you possibly like Bert?” I asked. Kris was firm: “Bert is sensible.” I just shook my head.

[all of this madness is via Metafilter, of course]

Mechanix Illustrated – March 1939

I often buy old magazines at antique stores and garage sales. They can be fantastic fun to browse through. I have several issues of Mechanix Illustrated, a sort of do-it-yourself mag from the mid-1900s. I’ve scanned in some of my favorite pages from the March 1939 issue. Click any photo to view a larger version. For more from this issue, visit my Mechanix Illustrated gallery on Flickr.

First, the cover:

[Cover of Mechanix Illustrated, March 1939]

It looks as if the magazine has just undergone a price increase: now 10¢. Also, notice that the magazine is guaranteed. How great is that? (By the way, the article on the Technicolor camera reveals that there are only fourteen in existence, and that each one costs $16,000.)

One feature of these mags is the ads. They’re packed with advertising, similar to modern women’s magazines. Of the magazine’s first 34 pages, one full-page and two half-pages are devoted to the table of contents, one full-page to the cover, and only one full-page and ten half-pages are devoted to actual content. The rest is advertising. That’s nine pages of editorial content and twenty-five pages of ads. The magazine’s final 34 pages have a similar ratio of content-to-ads. The middle fifty-or-so pages have fewer ads.

Here’s a typical ad:

[funny ads abound]

I could teach these skinny guys how to gain weight…

Take a look at the news story to the left of the ad. It’s good, too: two guys who’ve built a diving helmet from an old hot water heater. Awesome!

Mechanix Illustrated features announcements of recent inventions. Some of these are absurd, but many of them are neat to see because they represent the advance of technology we now deem commonplace, technology like automobile turn signals:

[photo of turn signal]

Technology like track hurdles that tip over on contact:

[photo of track hurdle]

This issue features a full page on denture technology! This is my favorite photo from the feature:

[photo of dentures smoking cigarette...seriously]

I love the smoking cigarette firmly planted between the teeth. These people had their priorities straight!

Remember that guarantee on the cover?

[Double money-back guarantee]

What if modern magazines carried such a guarantee? Could I return copies of Newsweek that are filled with fluff pieces and thinly-veiled advertisements for new products?

And, of course, no magazine from this era would be complete without an orgasmic cigarette ad:

[Lucky Strike ad from back cover]

Remember to check out more at my Mechanix Illustrated set on Flickr.

Modern Mechanix is a great magazine to explore, not just for the humor, but for the novel inventions, some of which became commonplace. Apparently I’m not the only one who loves it: one fellow has gone so far as to construct a Mechanix Illustrated blog!

Impasse with Vegetable Juice

Strolling through Costco today, I stopped in front of a stack of V8 juice.

Standing before me were hundreds of cans of vegetable juice, stuff that might actually be good for me. (In case you weren’t already aware: there is no material difference between fruit juice and soda. All you parents who won’t let your kids have soda but pump them full of fruit juice are victims of the advertising industry. (Fresh-squeezed fruit juice is slightly not-as-bad.))

I checked the nutrition stats for V8: a twelve-ounce can (well, 11.5-ounce can) contains only seventy calories and grants three grams of fiber. There’s a hell of a lot of sodium in the juice, but I can live with that. I don’t seem to have a sodium sensitivity. (Which is good, since I suck the stuff down. I even eat it raw sometimes.) The V8 packaging trumpets: “Two servings of vegetables in every can!”

I bought a case.

Now I’m faced with a dilemma: I don’t particularly like V8. Or at least I don’t think I like V8. I’ve never actually tried it. I have a life-long repulsion to liquid tomato products, however; I like tomato products of middling viscosity.

I am loathe to try tomato soup (though I once had a delicious tomato soup that Pam made for a dinner party), and I won’t drink tomato juice. On the other hand, I cannot bring myself to eat a raw tomato in any form. The stuff in the middle of the tomato-spectrum is fine: catsup, ketchup (what’s the difference there, foodies?), tomato sauce, tomato paste, salsa — all good.

Now I have an opened can of V8 sitting by my side, but I’m hesitant to take a sip. Nick already praised me for buying it, and downed a can in short order, but the most I can bring myself to do is sniff the stuff.

It smells like tomato soup.

I keep telling myself that if I’d only force myself to like it, then I’d have a ready source of vegetable nutrition, but so far that sort of reasoning just isn’t working.

Maybe I’ll go grab an orange juice.

Update: Two hours later, and the can is still sitting here. I’ve dipped my finger in, and the taste is fine, but I can’t get over the texture. sigh

Notebook Fetish

“Barnes & Noble is having a 40% off sale,” Tiff told us the other day. For once, Kris didn’t object to a trip to the bookstore.

I wandered around looking for great deals. I picked up a book on writing, and a book on the Hindenburg. I didn’t find as much as I’d hoped. Then Kris came up to me — her basket full of stocking stuffers and other little gifts — and said, “Did you see they have moleskines on sale?”

Well. I put my books back on the shelf and instead loaded my basket with $150 worth of my favorite notebook. (Which only cost me $90!) When we got home, I made a pile of my current notebook collection, a collection that is a sad reflection on the nature of one of my obsessions:


Click on this image to open the annotated Flickr version in a new window.

This is my notebook collection. (The notebooks I purchased the other night have big red dots on them.) Note that I don’t collect these the way one would collect stamps or coins or little ceramic cows. I collect these the way one would collect bags or buckets or old tools. I collect them because somewhere in the back of my mind, I believe these will be useful some day. Also note that nearly all of these are unused. And that this doesn’t include all of the notepads and index cards and reams of paper that I have stacked in various drawers and closets.

I admit that it’s probably just another irrational compulsion, but I don’t care. I now have seventeen moleskines and I want more!

(Further note: I am very particular about lined notebooks and journals. Most ruled paper drives me nuts. Most of it has these widely-spaced lines that are useless except for junior high school girls (with their bold, loopy handwriting). I like my journals narrow-ruled, and the narrower the better. That’s one reason I love moleskines.)

Ladybugs II: Electric Boogaloo

It’s difficult to believe that our home has been infested with ladybugs for four months now. (Actually, it’s only the media room that’s infested; they don’t go into the rest of the house.) Kris and I still debate their origin — eggs in the houseplants? or in through the window? — but we don’t debate that they’re fun to have around.

When I’m not mistaking them for soy nuts, or drinking the ones who crawl into my water bottle, they’re actually fairly entertaining. Even the cats think so. They’re just a little messy. There are ladybug carcasses all over the floor. On a trip to the bathroom in my stocking feet last night, I felt the tell-tale crunch of another ladybug going to the great garden in the sky.

As we were getting ready for bed we counted the swarm on the light fixture. “My personal best is twenty-five,” Kris told me. We counted twenty-one (though the eight on the cord itself was some sort of record). “You should take a picture,” she said, and since my camera was close at hand (eBay auctions, you know), I did. It was rather difficult because a) ladybugs are small, and in order to appreciate their vast number, it’s better to see them in person; (b) it’s difficult to produce a good photo shooting into a light source; and (c) my shots were hand-held. Still, here is a gallery of ladybugs:

The first shot is the broad overview of ladybugness.

a wide shot of the entire light fixture, ladybugs and all

Doesn’t look like much, does it? Click on the photo. It’ll open a full-size version in a new window. Scroll around. Count the ladybugs. Imagine them all flitting about, bonking into the light, making a more-or-less constant click-click noise. Imagine a wayward ladybug flitting by one of the cats: cat-snack. (And remember: there are even more ladybugs on the other side of these light fixtures; you’re only seeing a portion of them.)

Most of the ladybugs are various shades of red with black spots. A small percentage, however, are black with red spots. They’re inverse ladybugs. Are they bossbugs? Are they pariahs in ladybug culture? One was hanging out on the cord last night with some regular ladybugs:

a photo of several ladybugs on the cord, including a mysterious black ladybug

It’s possible that the ladybugs are drawn to the light fixture for warmth. I like to believe that they revere it as some sort of god, that they are drawn to this spot by some sort of holy ladybug dogma, are bound to pay homage to the god of light. And then get eaten by a cat. Or by me. Yech!

ladybugs worshiping at the altar of light

In other news, my second batch of eBay auctions ended Sunday. It wasn’t nearly as large as the first, but a couple of the items yielded a nice profit. (A couple of the items went dirt-cheap, too, which makes me sad.)

What’s odd about all this is that for some reason I find myself unable or unwilling to spend the money I’m earning. Yes, I’m continuing my normal monthly comic book purchases, and going out to eat now and then, but usually a large influx of money like this would lead me to some sort of frivolous expense: a new Mac! a new camera lens! a zillion comics! It’s true that I have bid on a couple of eBay auctions (including this lot that I really, really wanted — my max bid was $318), but I haven’t won anything; I’m unwilling to bid wantonly. What the hell is wrong with me!

Kentucky Fried Kitten

On the way to pick up dinner tonight, I came up with a brilliant business idea. Kris thinks it’s doomed to failure, but I don’t know. What do you think?

Here’s the concept: Kentucky Fried Kitten, just like Kentucky Fried Chicken (which was where I was headed to pick up dinner), but with kittens. And better!

Imagine your typical fast food restaurant, but with a special glassed-in cage area in which hundreds of kittens romp and play. While the parents are ordering food, their brood can paw at the glass wall, admiring the furry little scamps inside. “Which one do you like, Johnny?” asks Mom, and Johnny points to a little calico in the corner. A smiling teenager grabs the calico kitten, gives a wave, and vanishes to the kitchen.

A few minutes later: voila! Dinner is served. Deep-fried kitten. Crisp and juicy. Crazy delicious.

Some other key ideas regarding this exciting business opportunity:

  • BYOC! Customers will get a discount if they bring in their own cat.
  • A number of delicious dipping sauces will be available, from standards like honey mustard and barbeque, to more exotic flavors like spicy thai and yellow curry.
  • Customers can create a wide variety of combo meals, with popular sides such as mashed potatoes and cole slaw, and new favorites like goldfish crackers. Also, customers will be able to opt for white-meat only meals for a nominal surcharge.
  • Toys with the meals? No way! Each child gets to keep the skin of the kitten she eats. While the meat is coated in a mixture of secret seasonings and then dunked in bubbling vegetable oil, a specially trained employee is mounting the kitten’s skin for the customer to take home. Johnny’s little calico is a treasure for years to come.
  • Think of the low overhead. The Humane Society is always whining about how there are too many kittens. KFK takes care of that problem and provides delicious, nutritious meals in the process. (It may even be possible to charge the Humane Society for taking the kittens of their hands!) This is a meal that even Bob Barker would be proud to eat.
  • This is an opportunity for people to have closer contact with the food they eat. You always hear people preaching the importance of this, but do you ever see it put into practice? Now you will!

As you can see, this is a revolutionary concept, and the franchise opportunities are endless (as are the potential profits). I need to do some more brainstorming — you can help — before I move on to a business plan, but I think we’re close to a go here. I’m thinking of brining in Ken Lay as CEO.

Kentucky Fried Kitten: coming soon to a street corner near you.

Mmmmm…Finger-lickin’ good!

Winter Olympics 2006

The Winter Olympics begin today, which is a Big Deal in our household. I love the Olympics, but I hate the media’s U.S.-centric coverage. How well does the U.S. really do at the Olympic Games? I have the answer.

First, here are some general Olympics-related links:

We will soon be bombarded with medals charts showing how well the United States is doing. I’ve always believed these medal charts are deceptive. What does it really mean that the United States earned 34 medals at the 2002 Winter Olympics? Is a bronze medal just as good as a gold? Which is more impressive: that the United States won 34 medals or that Estonia won three?

Here is the BBC’s final medal chart from the 2002 Winter Olympics:

This chart is sorted by the number of gold medals earned by each country, but I feel this doesn’t accurately reflect how well each country performed. I want to know how well a country does in relation to its population, or how well it does based on the number of athletes it sends to the Olympic Games.

Four years ago I created a spreadsheet to track exactly this sort of information. What did I find?

Though the U.S. finished second in total medals won, its accomplishments were actually rather mediocre by any other measure. To my mind, the country with the best performance at the 2002 Winter Olympics — and by a huge margin — was Norway. Norway only earned 24 medals to the United States’ 34 (Germany finished first with 35), but Norway is a much smaller country, sent fewer athletes to the competition, and has a smaller Gross Domestic Product. Norway kicked ass.

Here’s how I would sort the medal chart from the 2002 Winter Games:

More detailed information is available from my full spreadsheet.

I intend to keep detailed information regarding each country’s performance again for the 2006 Winter Olympics. When this information is active (which is not the case as of this moment), you’ll be able to find it at the foldedspace.org 2006 Olympics medal tracker page. Check back throughout the Olympics for updated standings.

I have vivid recollections of watching the Opening Cermonies in 2002 at Mac and Pam’s house. The two Ice Queens huddled beneath blankets, and the four of us kept a running banter regarding each country’s outfits, etc. We spent the night. The next day MacDaddy and I went for Mexican food at La Costa. While we ate, we watched the luge and cross-country skiing. Good times. Good times.